I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
pop tarts are not kleenex
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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