Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
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