i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
