and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
