Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
