this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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