Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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