So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
she peed on how many people?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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