This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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