Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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