he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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