don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
