And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
It's rum buckets o'clock
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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