afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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