she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
