We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
