Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
