STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
