That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
