the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
