Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
