Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
