I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
