I want to walk on stilts...naked
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
