Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
