What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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