her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
