I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
