Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
