you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
