I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
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