People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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