wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize