Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
