I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
