just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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