omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
