physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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