Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
