On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
