You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
