We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
