Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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