Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
no you cant smoke seaweed
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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