Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
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