He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
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