He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
one two three fourrrrnication!
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
