it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
