rhymes with "ouble enetration"
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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