For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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